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Movie mini-reviews for October 30, 2009
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These are Roger Ebert's mini-reviews (unless otherwise noted) of some of the films currently playing in the Quad-Cities. "Terminator: Salvation" (PG -13, 115 minutes). Roughly 90 percent of the running time is occupied by action sequences, chase sequences, motorcycle sequences, plow-truck sequences, helicopter sequences, fighter-plane sequences, towering-android sequences and fistfights. It gives you all the pleasure of a video game without the bother of having to play it. With Christian Bale, Moon Bloodgood. Rating: 2 stars. "Angels and Demons" (PG-13, 138 minutes). Professor Tom Hanks is back on the trail again, racing through Rome against a ticking time bomb to save four kidnapped cardinals and reach a vial of anti-matter that could vaporize the Vatican. Meanwhile, there is intrigue within the College of Cardinals and evidence the previous pope was murdered. This kind of thriller requires us to accept the preposterous, and if we do, it promises to entertain. "Angels and Demons" succeeds. Rating: 3 stars."Bruno" (R, 82 minutes). The title character is a deliberately provocative, flamboyantly gay man who ambushes innocent bystanders in his desperate bid for celebrity. Sacha Baron Cohen ("Borat") shows nerve in placing himself in real situations in front of a rabid wrestling crowd and an outraged TV studio audience. Among those not in on the gag are Congressman Ron Paul, who angrily flees an apparent seduction attempt. The needle on my internal Laugh Meter went haywire, bouncing between hilarity, appreciation, shock, admiration, disgust, disbelief and appalled incredulity. Rating: 3-1/2 stars. "The Collector" (R, 88 minutes). Desperate to repay his debt to his ex-wife, an ex-con plots a heist at his new employer's country home, unaware that a second criminal has also targeted the property, and rigged it with a series of deadly traps. Starring Josh Stewart, Karley Scott Collins; directed by Marcus Dunstan. Pervasive sadistic bloody violence, language and some sexuality/nudity, (MovieWeb.com; not available for review) "The Hurt Locker" (R, 127 minutes). A great film. Jeremy Renner stars as a bomb-defusing specialist under fire in Iraq. Not a phony action movie, no false alarms, but almost unbearable suspense. Anthony Mackie plays the head of his support team. Director Kathryn Bigelow, a master of intelligent action ("Strange Days," "K-19: The Widowmaker"), superbly creates suspense out of the traditional tools of performance, story, timing and editing. Rating: 4 stars. (Roger Ebert, Chicago Sun-Times) "X Games 3D: The Movie" (PG, 92 minutes). A documentary about the extreme sports of skateboarding, motorcycle jumping and motocross, which strangely doesn't share the point scores with us and often doesn't show the same stunt in one unbroken shot. Yes, these athletes are awesomely skilled; also, masochists who play with broken bones because they want to "take the sport to a new level." Lots of falls that look like they really hurt. Rating: 1-1/2 stars. "Bandslam" (PG, 111 minutes). A geeky kid (Gaelan Connell) gets chosen to manage a popular girl's (Aly Michalka) high-school band for a big tri-state competition. He recruits a quiet loner (Vanessa Hudgens of "High School Musical") to join the band, romantic complications develop, and all is settled at the Bandslam. Charming, and not any more innocuous than it has to be. Rating: 3 stars. "Public Enemies" (R, 140 minutes). Shrugs off the way we depend on myth to sentimentalize our outlaws. Well-researched, many actual locations; Johnny Depp plays John Dillinger as efficient, violent, and hard as steel. Marion Cotillard is effective as Billie Frechette, his girlfriend at the end, who masks her vulnerability with sweetness. Christian Bale is all business as FBI agent Melvin Purvis. Billy Crudup plays J. Edgar Hoover as a dreamer unfamiliar with the brass tacks of law enforcement. Directed by Michael Mann ("Heat") with precision, sidestepping cliches and sweeteners. Rating: 3-1/2 stars. "Post Grad" (PG-13, 89 minutes). A screwball comedy and also, I have to say, a feel-good movie that made me smile a lot. It's about the Malby family, who are just plain nice, and stick together, and have goofy things happens to them. Alexis Bledel glows in the lead as a recent grad who's job-hunting. Her family is played by Michael Keaton, Jane Lynch and grandma Carol Burnett, and her best friend (but not boyfriend) is Zach Gilford. Evokes the movies of a more innocent time. Rating: 3 stars. "My Sister's Keeper" (PG-13, 108 minutes). An 11-year-old girl files suit to prevent her parents from making her donate a kidney for her very ill 16-year-old sister. An effective tearjerker, well acted, based on the best seller by Jodi Picoult. Persuasive performances by Abigail Breslin as the girl who is suing, Sofia Vassilieva as her sister, Cameron Diaz and Jason Patric as her parents, and Alec Baldwin and Joan Cusack. Directed by Nick Cassavetes. Rating: 3-1/2 stars. "Star Trek" (PG-13, 126 minutes). The starship Enterprise makes its first mission to neutralize a time-traveling Romulan craft, but this is really the story of how the Enterprise crew meets, hammers out its differences and becomes a team. The reboot offers compelling new angles on iconic science-fiction characters, spot-on casting and a young, sexy vibe. Starring Chris Pine as Kirk, Zachary Quinto as Spock, plus Simon Pegg, Karl Urban, Zoe Saldana, John Cho, Anton Yelchin, Eric Bana, Bruce Greenwood and Winona Ryder. Rating: 3 stars. (Colin Covert, McClatchy Newspapers) "The Goods: Live Hard, Sell Hard" (R, 90 minutes). A cheerfully, energetically vulgar comedy. Contains a lot of laughs and has studied Political Correctness only enough to make a list of groups to offend. It involves a failing car dealer (James Brolin) who calls in a hired gun (Jeremy Piven) and his team to move goods off the lot over the Fourth of July. With David Koechner, Kathryn Hahn, Ving Rhames, Ed Helms and Charles Napier. Rating: 3 stars. "Pandorum" (R, 104 minutes). This tight, minimalist, "Alien"-esque picture is as claustrophobic as you'd expect, if not quite as paranoid as you might hope. Ben Foster and Dennis Quaid, crew members of the Elysium, a vast colonizer ship on a 100-year voyage, awaken confused and alone. The power is failing, the ship is creaking, and no one responds to their radio calls. One sets out to explore the darkened ship and finds ... well, that's the story. Perhaps the best movie based on a video game to not actually have a video game to base it on. Rating: 2-1/2 stars. (Roger Moore, Orlando Sentinel) "Jennifer's Body" (R, 102 minutes). In her first starring role, Megan Fox plays the most popular girl in school, who is transformed into a fiend who eats the flesh of teenage boys. Amanda Seyfried plays her lifelong friend and the only one who realizes she's become a demon. Not an assembly-line teen horror thriller; has a gleeful relish. Diablo Cody's first screenplay after "Juno." Directed by Karyn Kusama ("Girlfight"). Rating: 3 stars. "I Can Do Bad All By Myself," (PG-13, 113 minutes). Madea (writer/director Tyler Perry, again in full-bosom drag) practices tough love on miscreant kids, putting them in the hands of their aunt (Taraji P. Henson), a nightclub singer struggling to get her own life together. Why we'd see it: Perry's work is hugely popular, and "Bad" looks to have his trademark blend of raunch and moral uplift -- with musical numbers, too. (Mary J. Blige and Gladys Knight are in the cast.) Why we wouldn't: Perry seems to keep remaking the same movie. (McClatchy Newspapers; not available for review) "9" (PG-13, 79 minutes). A humanoid little rag doll comes to life and ventures fearfully into the devastation of a bombed-out cityscape. This figure, named 9, and his similar predecessors, No. 1 through No. 8, find themselves in battle against a Transformer-like red-eyed monster called the Beast. This provides a pretext for an apocalyptic battle that is visually more interesting than, but as relentless as, similar all-action-all-the-time movies. This is a disappointment. By Shane Acker, Oscar-nominated for the 2006 short that inspired this movie. Rating: 3 stars. "Sorority Row" (R, 111 minutes) After one of them dies in a prank gone wrong, sorority sisters try to keep the death a secret ... but find themselves stalked by a murderous stranger. What others say: "Boasting a welcome sense of tongue-in-cheek humor and girlsploitation heroics (all the product placements get a bit much, though), 'Sorority Row' isn't just another brain-dead and bloodthirsty exercise in macabrely entertaining those who like to watch people die in gruesome, graphic ways," says EmpireOnline.co.uk. Why we'd see it: There's a big shower scene, right? Why we wouldn't: No-name director and cast don't inspire confidence. (McClatchy Newspapers; not available for review) "Whiteout" (R, 97 minutes). Kate Beckinsale strips down for a shower, then dons her parka as Carrie Stetko, the only U.S. marshal in Antarctica, investigating a series of mysterious deaths as the onset of winter threatens to shut down the continent. An indifferent thriller based on a grittier comic book, also starring Tom Skerritt, Columbus Short and Gabriel Macht. Rating: 1-1/2 stars. (Roger Moore, Orlando Sentinel) "Extract" (R, 91 minutes). Comedy by Mike Judge ("Beavis and Butthead") about the owner of a bottling plant (Jason Bateman), who is plagued with an uninterested wife (Kristen Wiig), a factory con woman (Mila Kunis), a litigious worker (Clifton Collins Jr.) and, in the movie's best performance, a relentless neighbor (David Koechner), who seemingly lurks in the shrubbery to burst forth with undesired friendliness. Ben Affleck is the friendly bartender who suggests Bateman recruit a gigolo to seduce his wife, so he will therefore be free to cheat. Rating: 2-1/2 stars. "Gamer" (R, 95 minutes) In the future, people play video games in which real living humans -- convicts who volunteer, hoping for an early release -- become pawns in life-and-death scenarios. Why we'd see it: We're big fans of Scottish actor Gerard Butler (as one of the prisoners who gets wrapped up in the game) and Michael C. Hall (TV's "Dexter," as a sinister game designer). Why we wouldn't: Writers/directors Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor made the high-energy, low-content "Crank" films. This looks like more of the same ... and we're looking for something more substantial. Frenetic sequences of strong, brutal violence throughout, sexual content, nudity and language. (McClatchy Newspapers; not available for review) "Taking Woodstock" (R, 120 minutes). Ang Lee's entertaining film about the kid who made it all possible -- in Woodstock, anyway -- Elliot Teichberg (Demetri Martin), who leaves a New York City job to return to upstate New York and help his parents bail out their failing and shabby motel. After he arranges a permit for a rock festival to be held, history is made, and the film sees it through his eyes. With a winning supporting role for Liev Schreiber as the transvestite ex-Marine who volunteers as the motel's chief of security. Rating: 3 stars. "Inglourious Basterds" (R, 152 minutes). A big, bold, audacious war movie that will annoy some, startle others, and demonstrate once again that Quentin Tarantino is the real thing, a director of quixotic delights. Brad Pitt, Melanie Laurent and Christoph Waltz star as a hero, a girl and a Nazi in a virtuoso combination of action, droll satire, movie references, rewritten history, and delight in filmmaking itself. Leave it to Tarantino to provide World War II with a much-needed alternative ending. For once, the bastards get what's coming to them. Rating: 4 stars. "Shorts" (PG, 87 minutes) Eleven-year-old Toe Thompson is the designated punching bag for the bullies of suburban Black Falls. During a freak storm, a mysterious Rainbow Rock, which grants wishes to anyone who finds it, falls from the sky. Suddenly, the neighborhood that Toe already thinks is weird gets a lot weirder. As the Rainbow Rock ricochets around town -- from kid to kid and parent to parent -- wishes-come-true quickly turn the neighborhood upside down in a wild rampage of everything from tiny aliens to giant boogers. Rating: 3 stars. (Roger Moore, Orlando Sentinel) "The Time Traveler's Wife" (PG-13, 107 minutes). Clare (Rachel McAdams) is in love with a man who frequently disappears into thin air, leaving behind his clothing in a pile on the floor. Henry (Eric Bana) is a time traveler whose trips are beyond his control. Another problem is that whenever he arrives at another time, he's naked and has to steal clothes. You'd think he'd be demoralized, but somehow the warmth of the actors makes it a bittersweet love story. Rating: 2-1/2 stars. "500 Days of Summer" (PG-13, 95 minutes). Tom (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) had Summer (Zooey Deschanel) in his life for 500 days and can't accept that they were numbered. She had absolutely no interest in getting married. A delightful comedy of bittersweet romance, stylishly inventive, charmingly acted, that tries everything from a musical number to a black-and-white sequence to deal with a story that refuses to be a well-behaved romcom. Directed by Marc Webb. Rating: 4 stars. "Julie & Julia" (PG-13, 123 minutes). A frustrated Queens wife vows to write a blog about cooking her way through Julia Child's "Mastering the Art of French Cooking," 524 recipes, in 365 days. The film shows the effect of culinary dedication on both women's lives and marriages. Amy Adams and Meryl Streep are engaging, and Streep's impersonation of Child is uncanny, but really, is the price of total obsession worth paying for the cost of a perfect boeuf bourguignon? Rating: 2-1/2 stars. "District 9" (R, 111 minutes). An alien spaceship hovers over Johannesburg, its occupants stranded and starving. They're placed in a fenced-in district where the locals fear and resent them. Looking like a cross between lobsters and grasshoppers, they're sort of loathsome, but one human and one alien work together, in a mockumentary with apartheid parallels. Rating: 3 stars. "Ponyo" (G, 101 minutes). The word is "magical." This poetic, breathtaking work by the greatest of all animators has such deep charm that adults and children both will be touched. A goldfish becomes human and makes friends with a little boy, upsetting the balance between land and sea. With the voices of Matt Damon, Cate Blanchett, Liam Neeson, Tina Fey and Frankie Jonas; directed by the great Hayao Miyazaki. Rating: 4 stars. "A Perfect Getaway" (R, 97 minutes). Two couples join up during a difficult wilderness hike on the Hawaiian island of Kauai, while meanwhile the killer(s) of a newlywed couple in Honolulu may now be on the same island. It's creepy out there in the forest, and how much do you really know about nice folks you meet on vacation? With Steve Zahn, Timothy Olyphant, Milla Jovovich and Kiele Sanchez. A deceptive thriller. Rating: 3 stars. "Funny People" (R, 146 minutes). This is a different Adam Sandler, deeper, more thoughtful, in a comedy with thoughtful undertones about a show-biz superstar who is told he has weeks to live. Writer-director Judd Apatow joins him with fine supporting work by Seth Rogen and Leslie Mann, avoids more than a few obvious cliches, and deals not just with mortality, but with the cutthroat world of stand-up comedians. Eric Bana plays an outsize Aussie heavy, and look for Torsten Voges as a peculiarly chilling doctor. Rating: 3-1/2 stars. "The Ugly Truth" (R, 95 minutes). Katherine Heigl plays the producer of a failing early-morning newscast, and Gerard Butler is the macho local cable star brought in to boost her ratings. He ends up coaching her in her efforts to win the heart of a handsome doctor, in a movie where the actors are likable but the comedy bogs down in relentless predictability and the puzzling overuse of naughty words. Rating: 2 stars. "Whip It" (PG-13, 111 minutes). Ellen Page ("Juno") is plucky and enchanting in Drew Barrymore's directing debut. She plays a small-town Texas girl, sick of the beauty pageants her mother fires her into, who sneaks off to Austin one night, sees a roller derby and gets a whole new idea of herself. Page, doing her own skating, is small but fast and earns the respect of her teammates in an unreasonably entertaining coming-of-age comedy that sees the modern version of roller derby as a sort of gothic-punk warrior-woman ritual. Rating: 3-1/2 stars. "Capitalism: A Love Story" (R, 117 minutes). Michael Moore's latest doesn't suggest a solution for our economy, and it is a little disorganized, but it contains chilling explanations of "peasant insurance" and the Wall Street gambling known as "derivatives." There is also awesome, long-forgotten footage of Franklin Roosevelt calling for a Second Bill of Rights. And first-person testimony from victims of the meltdown. Rating: 3-1/2 stars. "All About Steve" (PG-13, 98 minutes). Sandra Bullock plays Mary Horowitz, a crossword-puzzle constructor who, on a blind date, falls insanely in love with Steve, a TV-news cameraman (Bradley Cooper, from "The Hangover"). The operative word is "insanely." The movie is billed as a comedy but more resembles a perplexing public display of irrational behavior. Seeing her run around as a basket case makes you appreciate Lucille Ball, who could play a dizzy dame and make you like her. Rating: 1-1/2 stars. "Fame" (PG, 107 minutes). A pale retread of the 1980 classic, lacking the power and emotion of the original. Hopeful kids enroll in the New York City School of the Performing Arts and struggle through four years to find themselves. Their back stories are shallow, many seem too old and confident, the plot doesn't engage them, and although individual performers like Naturi Naughton sparkle (as a classical pianist who wants to sing hip-hop), the film is too superficial to make them convincing. Rating: 2 stars. "Surrogates" (PG-13, 88 minutes). In the future, the human population reclines at home without moving, while living vicariously through robot avatars controlled by their minds. They present themselves to the world as younger and more attractive than they really are. Bruce Willis stars as an FBI agent investigating the murder of the son of the inventor of surrogates. An intriguing premise, but it descends too quickly into action formulas and loses opportunities to explore the premise. Rating: 2-1/2 stars. "The Proposal" (PG-13, 107 minutes). Sandra Bullock is back in form as a tyrannical boss from Canada who is threatened with deportation and commands her long-suffering assistant (Ryan Reynolds) to marry her. He has motives of his own, and takes her home to Sitka, Alaska, where his family takes the "engagement" seriously. Predictable, of course, but charming. Betty White and Mary Steenburgen sparkle. Rating: 3 stars. "Love Happens" (PG-13, 117 minutes). Aaron Eckhart plays Burke Ryan, a widowed motivational speaker. He meets Eloise (Jennifer Aniston), the quirky girl who can make him love again, when she ends up at one of his seminars. Despite having the same template as a hundred screen romances, co-writer and director Brandon Camp can't make this work. Rating: 1-1/2 stars. (Roger Moore, Orlando Sentinal) "Toy Story," "Toy Story 2" (G, 180 minutes). Converting Pixar's history-changing cartoons into 3D and pairing them in theaters for a double feature reminds us how very good these movies were and remain, how great the computer animation, and how witty and sentimental the scripts. The movies look fabulous. But three hours of rewatching movies you probably already have at home may be too much, even with extra featurettes. Rating: 4 stars. (Roger Moore, Orlando Sentinel) 
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