A smartphone has to do more to earn its name


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Posted Online: Jan. 20, 2013, 6:04 pm
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By John Marx, jmarx@qconline.com
To the best of my knowledge:
- Maybe we should go back to the good ol' days and get a girlfriend we can see, touch and produce when people ask to see her.
-The late Stan Musial was the kindest, most humble and gracious superstar -- and he was a superstar -- I ever met. He was free with his time, honest with his answers and always thought it was neat people wanted to tell his story. He was my late father's favorite player and probably the reason my dad introduced me to being a St. Louis Cardinals baseball fan.
-It's impossible to act natural around the cops even if you haven't done anything wrong.
- It'd be great if the dollar store sold gas.
- There should be a fitness protection program.
- "Suits'' is easily television's best show.
- Someone somewhere decided it was mandatory to make school buses uncomfortable. I'd like a word or two with that chap.
-Sleep and a Jim's Rib Haven boney box dinner pretty much can solve everything. I used one of them to get over the flu recently, and it wasn't sleep.
- Working out can be done without telling us on Twitter.
- The biggest complainers are those who contribute the least amount to the cause.
- Medicine companies have no idea what real fruit tastes like.
-Andre Holland, of the NBC TV show "1600 Penn,'' is a great guy. Holland did lots of time in the Quad-Cities shooting the movie "Sugar'' and was impressive and wonderful to get to know. It's great to see one of Hollywood's good guys have success.
-Young people are our greatest resource for many things. Humor is one. Here's what I overheard at a recent high school basketball game. A teenage male was talking to a teenage female:
"Are you a parking ticket? Because you have fine written all over you.'' It even made me blush in between laughs.
-Rather than agreeing to disagree, some folks should just be quiet.
-I'll call it a smartphone the first time it reminds me where I left it and to put it on vibrate during church.
-The Pete Rose reality show is the best one on television. To that, it doesn't take much to pass Honey Boo Boo.
-You know you need a break when you fall asleep in the middle of putting on your socks. You put one on and wake up 30 minutes later to put on the second.
-I read that in 75 percent of American households women handle the money and pay the bills. Thank goodness it's 100 percent at my house.
-Any group of retired morning coffee drinkers would be a better Cabinet than anything the president could choose. They solve all our nation's problems in just three hours per day.
-Having the pharmacist suggest you go shop while they take the time filling your prescription is as annoying as straight-to-your-face up-sell.
-Pitchers and catchers report in three weeks. Life is good.
Columnist John Marx can be reached at (309) 757-8388 or jmarx@qconline.com.
















 



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  Today is Saturday, Aug. 2, the 214th day of 2014. There are 151 days left in the year.

1864 -- 150 years ago: Because of the National Fast, no paper will be issued from this office tomorrow.
1889 -- 125 years ago: Attracting considerable attention is a sunflower stalk 15 feet high and still growing in the yard of Dr. C. Speidel on 23rd Street in Rock Island.
1914 -- 100 years ago: The municipal bathing beach proposition came up again at the city commission's meeting and a proposition passed, provided that a locker room be constructed at the foot of 7th Street for the accommodation of the bathers.
1939 -- 75 years ago: Plans for erecting a $14,000 warehouse to replace the frame structure at the rear of the Augustana Book Concern were announced.
1964 -- 50 years ago: Hours for tours of the new Deere & Co. Administrative Center on John Deere Road will be changed, effective Monday.
1989 -- 25 years ago: Tuesday night at the Great Mississippi Valley Fair in Davenport the Nitty Gritty Dirt Band gave its fans more than they possibly could have expected. The band took the stage at 9:07 p.m. and didn't leave until 10:40.









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