LOCAL FOOTBALL SCORING UPDATES PRESENTED BY THE HUNGRY HOBO:

"Identity Thief" a road trip you may want to skip


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Posted Online: Feb. 07, 2013, 10:33 am
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By Roger Moore


"Oooh, honey, less is more," the flamboyant hair stylist whispers, out of earshot, at Diana (Melissa McCarthy) as she bombs her head with hairspray and trowels on the eye shadow.

That's never the case with McCarthy, the bawdy, rude, larger-than-life comic whose big movie break was "Bridesmaids." She riffs, tosses back belts of booze and punches galore as the crass and crude title character in "Identity Thief."

But "less is more" might have helped this cumbersome comedy that has Sandy, Jason Bateman's mild-mannered office drone, trying to wrestle Diana across the country to save his job, clear his criminal and credit records and make this opportunistic crook see the consequences of her actions.

It's overstuffed with villains, from Sandy's sneering, Ayn Rand-quoting boss (Jon Favreau) who greedily keeps all the company profits for himself, to the two thugs (Genesis Rodriguez and T.I.) chasing Diane for ripping them off, to those thugs' imprisoned boss (Jonathan Banks) who wants Diana dead, to the skip tracer (Robert Patrick) determined to fetch her for his bail bondsman client.

There are car chases, rowdy sex romps in cheap hotels and lots of scenes where Diana trots out her skills at lying, conning, stealing, copying credit cards and opening handcuffs.

While the filmmakers might have shot for "Midnight Run" but would have settled for "Due Date," they wound up only achieving "Guilt Trip." "Identity Thief" is sputtering long before that mid-movie moment when it turns all sentimental and goes off the rails.

Bateman, the guy America loves to see suffer, isn't just the passive straight man here -- probably a mistake as McCarthy, in her first lead role outside of a TV sitcom, tries too hard. Singing along to every song on the radio, trying to escape on foot (futile), punching those who get in her way in the throat, she sucks all the oxygen out of this thing even when she's not straining to find an extra laugh in a scene.

Bateman's Sandy spends a lot of time being insulted over his "girl" name -- "It's UNI-sex" -- and gets entirely too wise to Diane's tricks too early on.

The way "Midnight Run" works is in one character underestimating the other. "Due Date's" comedy is in the slow Robert Downey burn as we wait for the put-upon one to finally go off. Director Seth ("Horrible Bosses") Gordon doesn't get that.

There are some huge laughs in this. But making Sandy as testy as Diana, straight off, denies this road trip of its comic tension. So as much righteous fun as it is to see the woman who has stolen unisex Sandy's name and credit and wrecked his life get clocked with a guitar, having it happen 13 minutes into the film robs "Identity Thief" of its punch.






"Identity Thief"


MPAA rating: R for sexual content and language
Length: 110 minutes
Rating: 2 stars 
















 



Local events heading








  Today is Monday, Sept. 22, the 265th day of 2014. There are 100 days left in the year.

1864 -- 150 years ago: The board of education has granted Thursday as a holiday for the children, with the expectation that parents who desire to have their children attend the Scott County Fair will do so on that day and save irregularity the rest of the week.
1889 -- 125 years ago: The guard fence around the new cement walk at the Harper House has been removed. The blocks are diamond shape, alternating in black and white.
1914 -- 100 years ago: The Rev. R.B. Williams, former pastor of the First Methodist Church, Rock Island, was named superintendent of the Rock Island District.
1939 -- 75 years ago: Abnormally high temperatures and lack of rainfall in Illinois during the past week have speeded maturing of corn and soybean crops.
1964 -- 50 years ago: Installation of a new television system in St. Anthony's Hospital, which includes a closed circuit channel as well as the three regular Quad-Cities channels, has been completed and now is in operation.
1989 -- 25 years ago: When the new Moline High School was built in 1958, along with it were plans to construct a football field in the bowl near 34th Street on the campus. Wednesday afternoon, more than 30 years later, the Moline Board of Education Athletic Board sent the ball rolling toward the possible construction of that field by asking superintendent Richard Hennigan to take to the board of education a proposal to hire a consultant.






(More History)