PREP FOOTBALL SCORING UPDATES PRESENTED BY THE HUNGRY HOBO:

Gasp! It snows during Midwest winter


Share
Posted Online: Feb. 21, 2013, 6:20 pm
Comment on this story | Print this story | Email this story
By John Marx, jmarx@qconline.com
To the best of my knowledge:

** It snowed. It's the Midwest. It's Friday. We have moved on despite being trampled with Armageddon-like nonsense from television stations the last 24 hours.

** Mirrors don't lie. And thank goodness they don't laugh.

** If the sermon's going to be 20 minutes and you don't want me looking at the inside of my eyelids, then it had better make sense.

** Silence is the best answer to a stupid question. Why make it worse?

** It's a pretty boring sports winter if you spend two weeks making a fuss over Michael Jordan's 50th birthday.

** Miss Vickies sea salt and vinegar potato chips are the greatest chips on the planet.

** Never allow friends to bust out their wedding videos, especially if they got married when the macarena was popular.

** Social networking in my day was called playing outside, brought on by your mother telling you to get out of her house.

** One's level of maturity depends greatly on the company we keep. Look around; makes sense, doesn't it?

** I'm four boxes in and the Girl Scout "thin'' mints aren't working.

** No matter what color is on the outside, it's still chocolate on the inside of an M&M, right? And the colors are just for show?

** You don't join in if someone else is singing a song, especially if it's a guy.

** A restaurant that holds your evening reservation for 15 minutes on a Friday or Saturday is DOING YOU A FAVOR. Be there on time or don't make the reservation.

** Lance Armstrong is going as a seven-time Tour de France winner next Halloween (shared with me by a local coffee group/world-problem-solving organization).

** A night with the Quad City Mallards is a good time. Here's hoping the club can find solid footing and stay for a while.

** Everyone loves a good political joke until it gets elected (from the coffee group/world problem-solving organization) .

** I'd rather have a text telling me the voice mail someone left was worth listening to.

** All the meteor thing confirmed was that nothing is pretty about Russia.

** The rumor that the Pope is using retirement talk so he can negotiate a bigger and better contract is not true (told to me as I'm walking into church last Saturday).

** It is downright insane to rush the field or the floor after your team wins the game. Every college should be fined $100,000 each time it happens. Take a page from the Moline High School staff on how to handle basketball games before, during and after.

** There's someone out there stuck in traffic on their way to a gym to ride a stationary bike.

** Someone needs to make an app to remind you each time your wife gets a haircut.
Columnist John Marx can be reached at (309) 757-8388 or jmarx@qconline.com.
















 




Local events heading








  Today is Saturday, Aug. 30, the 242nd day of 2014. There are 123 days left in the year.

1864 — 150 years ago: A large pair of elk, captured in Iowa, were exhibited in Market Square today.
1889 — 125 years ago: The Rock Island Arsenal dam was being constructed under the supervision of Charles Frances, of Lowell, Mass.
1914 — 100 years ago: Mrs. Frank Mixer, of Rock Island, was the winner of the final preliminary for the women's handicap golf cup at Rock Island arsenal links.
1939 — 75 years ago: Sixteen hundred persons — many from war-fearful Europe — arrived in New York aboard the German liner Bremen. For two days on the trip, passengers were cut off from the world with both incoming and outgoing radio messages banned.
1964 — 50 years ago: Police reported five youths have been involved in the theft of about seven cars in recent weeks. Three of the youths were arrested Saturday afternoon, one was in custody as the result of a previous arrest, and the fifth is expected to be arrested today.
1989 — 25 years ago: The Rock Island/Milan School Board is asking the city to tear down Franklin School and allow the school district to pay back the estimated $100,00 cost during 10 years.






(More History)