Thoughts on snow from a guy who's now enjoying white sand


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Posted Online: Feb. 28, 2013, 6:50 pm
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By John Marx, jmarx@qconline.com
To the best of my knowledge:

— Not all city snow removal is created equal. A couple of local outposts apparently believe that if God put it there, God will take it away.

— No man knows more about women than I do, and I know nothing.

— There are three levels of pain. 1. Pain. 2. Pain so bad you ask for your mother. 3. Pain of stepping on a Lego or stubbing your toe on an Isabel Bloom statue in the middle of the night.

— Cities — are you listening, Davenport? — should stay out of the gambling business.

— It's not being lazy, it's being selective in one's participation.

— If they made it illegal to drive in the passing lane and not pass, 97 percent of the state of Iowa would be under arrest.

— Sixty-five should be the new 50 for those of us who like the boss we work for.

— Cordova has become the drama capital of the world. Apparently I'm the only one who has always had a good time in C-town.

— Six inches is NOT a lot of snow.

— The girl who got away is better than one who won't go away (shared with me by a local problem-solving, coffee-drinking group).

— The Flu Season Fist-Bump is a perfect winter replacement for the handshake.

— Florida in the 60s is better than home in the 20s. As you read this, I am up to my ears in white sand, spring training and Wolfgang Puck sesame chicken.

— Not even millions made and a couple of Oscars can buy Ben Affleck a good hairpiece.

— There's not much better than responding to a three-page, drawn-out, detailed-oriented text with a "K."

— You can build all the Titanics you want. Last time I looked, they still made icebergs.

— Standing next to a plowed snowdrift in a Galesburg parking lot will not make a weather-related TV report look any more dramatic. We know it snowed.

— You are more likely to die on the way to buying a lottery ticket than you are to win the lottery. You also have a great chance of being behind the dude who wants two dozen Powerball combinations when all you want to purchase is a soda.

— Just because I don't like the "Twilight" saga doesn't mean I don't get it. I get it; I just don't like it.

— We don't like or trust North Korea, so we send them Dennis Rodman? I hope the entire country thinks we all are just like him.

— Big-box shops have a place in our world, but there MUST be a place for the independent who knows his or her customers by name.
Columnist John Marx can be reached at (309) 757-8388 or jmarx@qconline.com.
















 



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  Today is Tuesday, July 29, the 210th day of 2014. There are 155 days left in the year.

1864 -- 150 years ago: Col. H.F. Sickless informs us that there will be new organization of troops in this state under the call for more men.
1889 -- 125 years ago: James Normoyle arrived home after graduating from West Point with honors in the class of 1889. He was to report to Fort Brady, Mich., as second lieutenant in the 23rd Infantry.
1914 -- 100 years ago: Austria Hungary declared war on Serbia. Germany and Austria refused an invitation of Sir Edward Grey to join Great Britain at a mediation conference.
1939 -- 75 years ago: Dr. William Mayo, the last of the three famous Mayo brother surgeons, died at the age of 78.
1964 -- 50 years ago: One of the biggest horse shows of the season was held yesterday at Hillandale Arena on Knoxville Road under the sponsorship of the Illowa Horsemen's Club.
1989 -- 25 years ago: Davenport is like a gigantic carnival this weekend with the Bix Arts Fest taking over 12 square blocks of the downtown area. A festive atmosphere prevailed Friday as thousands of people turned out to sample what the Arts Fest has to offer.








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