Posted Online: Sept. 27, 2012, 6:50 pm

Musing about commercials, Bandits, Honey Boo Boo and more

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By John Marx, jmarx@qconline.com

To the best of my knowledge:

-- Old is when your friends no longer ask you to help them move something.

-- The other line always moves faster.

-- We don't need Chicago- or New York-style anything in the Quad-Cities. We do pretty well with things that originate around here.

-- "Jersey Shore" is classical theater compared to Honey Boo Boo and her family.

-- You should never burn a bridge; just loosen a bolt or two each day.

-- Having one child makes you a parent. Having any more than one makes you a referee.

-- The Republican commercial jabbing Democrat Cheri Bustos and the road from her house to the country club is low-rent, cheap and classless.

-- The firehouse commercial for state representative candidate Neil Anderson, a Republican, is first rate. I don't believe he has enough push to unseat incumbent Democrat Pat Verschoore, but he has made great inroads and has run a first-rate campaign.

-- Afternoon is the part of the day we spend worrying about how we wasted the morning.

-- A coffee-drinking group of professional time wasters says marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband.

-- The Quad City Mallards' front office needs to prove to the community the club is on solid financial footing. Things are starting to take on a Rick Holtzman (former Quad-Cities baseball franchise owner) flavor with unpaid bills and ugly staff departures.

-- No one should care what Major League baseball team's Class A affiliate plays at Modern Woodmen Park. It is not as much about the product on the field as it is about fun with your friends and family at the park. The game really is secondary. I'm a St. Louis Cardinals fan and never put any stock in the selling of future big-leaguers playing here. Trust Stephanie Brown and her staff to make your night at the park a good time, not the players on the field. That said, it was a classless move by the Cardinals' brass to move to Peoria and to a facility not as nice as MWP.

-- Moline's Kevin Jones was flown to the Green Bay-Seattle football game by his family. You know the rest of the story -- another NFL game hurt by poor officiating. Jones says it was the first time he ever left a game knowing the number of an official. It was No. 26, and it belonged to Lance Easley, who awarded the Seahawks the bogus touchdown and the 14-12 victory. Welcome back, real NFL referees.

-- Everything worthwhile is mandatory, prohibited or taxed.

-- We are a lucky community to have Joe Moreno and volunteers who know what it takes to put on a big time event like the Quad Cities Marathon. It reminds me a lot of the work people do at the John Deere Classic.


Columnist John Marx can be reached at (309) 757-8388 or jmarx@qconline.com.